Fear

Fear can be incapacitating. I just lost my mother, and saw a cousin with speech problems because he fell from a ladder. I feel fine, but have some uneasiness in my gut. Somehow I feel I am not the same person I was two weeks ago.

I do not know much more than I knew before, but nevertheless the presence of death has sobered my attitude.

I saw my little nephew, the youngest son of my little brother, yesterday. He gets so happy when he learns new things that it is a pleasure to see him.  That is the good part, the bad part is to see my mother's urn, and my cousin's face.

Obviously all of us have to find an even path so we can help the little ones go ahead.

I fought with two people today already, the bus attendant that forced me to check in my  bag, instead of letting me take it inside the bus, like I always had done, and the secretary of a friend that was arguing with me about paying a friend's expenses.

I wonder if that was uncalled for. I have to calm down.